This week has been the longest yet that Kevin has been away from the kids, and in a week and a half he will be gone for a little over a month. It has been a tough week, with many bright spots in there too.
First, I'll illuminate the bright spots. The kids have done very well being gone for extended periods of time. For the most part, they have been cooperative. Also, they've for the most part done okay playing with others and minding. They've also been incredibly enjoyable.
We didn't do a lot of school this week. I skipped school yesterday for them to play in the garage, at which they had a TON of fun. I can't wait till Kevin gets back so we can buy John a bicycle so he can ride around too.
The kids had three major outbursts yesterday, the third of which I indulged in. First, Shana hit John so hard he had a bloody nose. Her only consequence was to look at her brother and see the extent of what she did. She was undone and asked to go to her room. She was there for about a half hour.
Second, they had a fit/argument with each other in front of my friend Stephanie and her kids. They were incredibly gracious and Stephanie said, "this is life!" I basically let them sort it out until about ten minutes later we were all eating snacks and you never would have known that they had been at each other so intensely. PHEW. That was hard to sit through, but my basic response was to ignore them and let them run out of energy. It seemed to work.
I wish I had remembered that several hours later, after garage play time, when we had to go to an appointment. I had mentioned that Shana might have time to watch a show before we left. That was totally my mistake!!! We had no such time to do anything!!! I told Shana I had changed my mind and she needed to change her clothes instead. Meanwhile, I was also changing John's diaper, so I was not available at all. She got angry and said, "I don't want to!" That sent us into an argument, because I was thinking of the fact that we had to leave. I said, "why don't you do what I say?" like I was pleading with her. Well, I really was, so I can't say much. Somehow we all got into the car, and behavior changed. When I got into the car, a friend texted asking us to come over. After our appointment, I said, "clean up toys and we can go do a playdate. If we don't clean up toys, we won't be able to." They did as I asked beautifully and we went and had fun with our friends for several hours. Glorious. I really appreciated the behavior change, and I wish I knew what to do to make sure they know we can reason things out together. I hadn't said "no show," I had just said that time was a bad time.
Thank God for renewal and change. They had a good day Thursday overall, even if it was dotted with difficulty. It's just a reminder for me that life is much more fluid than black and white, and things can turn on a dime. I think Jesus just shows up and makes a change in the situation, and I'm learning to be so grateful when He does that.
It's Friday morning, the "morning after," and both kids are either still sleeping, or playing quietly in their rooms. I've learned not to go up and check, because the day inevitably gets started then. I'm off to make some "master mix," that a friend posted on her blog, an all-purpose flour mix that looks pretty amazing. ;)
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